On the face of it, your gag reflex is only trying to help out.
The human body comes with a bunch of little fail safes and reactions that are aimed at keeping you alive. Your gag reflex in particular is meant to stop things from getting into your throat that are too big to swallow or properly digest. When you need it, it’s great (namely because it keeps you alive), however there are times that it becomes a bit of an inconvenience, like say during dentist visits or when you’re trying to give a blowjob.
As explained by the people at Live Science, the gag reflex is triggered by “an object touching the roof of your mouth, the back of your tongue, the area around your tonsils, or the back of your throat.” Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?
Gagging while giving a blowjob is a totally normal thing that happens to just about everyone from time to time, that doesn’t make it any less unpleasant to have it happen to you. So, here are some ways for you to continue serving up oral sex to your (no doubt) thankful partner, while keeping your natural reflex in check.
You don’t have to deep throat.
Oral sex doesn’t have to be the head-bobbing, forehead-vein-bulging affair that you see in porn. As a sexual act, a blowjob shouldn’t simply be focused on the pleasure of the person receiving it, rather both of the partners involved.
Adjust your blowjob technique so that you’re not fully enveloping their penis in your mouth. Make ready use of your hands to stroke the shaft as you work the head of their penis with your tongue and mouth. Even when you’re not stroking the shaft, always keep one hand wrapped around the base of the penis so that you’re in control of depth and pace.
For readers facing the small mouth, big dick dilemma, using you hands to reach places of his penis where your mouth cannot is going to go a long way. Pro tip: as you suck and lick the head of the penis, allow some saliva to drip out to provide lubrication for you handiwork on the shaft.
Don’t forget to come up for air.
While giving head, try breathing through your nose while he’s in your mouth – this may seem like the most obvious advice, but being conscious of your breathing will help greatly in reducing any anxiety you might feel about gagging. While breathing through your nose will help you create an uninterrupted blowjob rhythm, remember that there’s nothing wrong with coming up for air or giving your jaw and mouth a break every now and then. As mentioned previously, this is why it’s important to be using your hands as well to keep your mouth from having to do all the heavy lifting.
Now if you’ve read these above tips and are thinking “yes BUT I still want to give an enthusiastic blowjob in which I miiiiight gag, what should I do?” then yes, we’ve got some advice for you as well:
Find your ‘gag zone’.
Discover where your gag reflex starts on your own time before learning mid-blowjob. You can do this by brushing your tongue when you brush your teeth and seeing how far back the toothbrush can go before a gag reflex is triggered. The area nearest the tip of your tongue where the gag begins is the place you can consider as your ‘gag limit’.
Train your gag reflex.
If you have an overactive or very sensitive gag response, you can try some exposure therapy in order to possibly lessen your gag response. Dentists with patients who have sensitive gag reflexes believe that you can ‘train’ your gag reflex by activating it purposely. This means that when you’re brushing your tongue, initiate a gag reflex repeatedly as much as you are comfortable doing. Doing this over the course of a few nights or mornings should — should! – decrease your gag response.