This first thing everyone wants to know is how I even got myself into this. So this is how the story goes. I was studying abroad and looking for some extra beer money. Stumbling into a late night job search online (after a few beers of course), I came across a posting that most matched my job skills… a copywriter… for… a sex toy company. How could it have not peaked my interest?
I immediately put my cyber stalking skills to test and looked up everything I could about the company and its employees. It was legit, and luxurious at that. I had never seen a $13,000 24-karat gold plated vibrator and I was already curious about the employee discount. I loved that the company valued inclusivity and diversity and I already had a ton of dirty puns ready to throw into some copy. After all, being raised with an outspoken older brother, I needed to be clever and witty to survive the constant attempts at humiliation. It was finally paying off.
As much as this seemed like a dream job, I had a lot of things to consider. For one, I was raised in a fairly conservative home where the topic of sex was taboo. And I shouldn’t say was, it still very much so is even late into my adulthood. I never received “the talk” and it goes so far that my mother still changes the channel if there’s a kissing scene on TV. I’m convinced my parents have only had sex twice, to create my brother and I, and still I find even this hard to believe. My dad even jokes that my mother sleeps with so many blankets that it’s like the Wall of China between them. You get the picture.
Aside from the embarrassment I could potentially provide my family with, I also considered what this would look like to future employers. I figured, if anything, they would consider me open-minded with a fresh perspective. At least that’s what I’ve convinced myself. Through it all, this is what I’ve learned from working at a sex toy company:
1. This is as real of a job as any.
Don’t get me wrong, it took some getting acclimated to the casual porn playing on my work computer (for research of course) or the occasional vibrator and whip giveaways in the office. Past all the bells and whistles, there are still deadlines, goals, disagreements, and people stealing my food in the lunchroom. I’m not a product tester. I’m not a sex fein. In fact, I’m pretty far away from being any type of “sexpert.” But I’ve worked with all of those people and they are nothing less than professional and amazing.
2. Everyone’s a freak, so get over it.
I don’t mean freak in a demeaning way either. I mean we all have our kinks, even the cookie-cutter soccer mom who’s always on a juice cleanse and runs about as many miles in a day as I do in a year – even she’s a freak. So let that freak flag fly! Whatever you’re into sexually, there’s definitely a community for you. From masturbating into pies to laying eggs (yeah, it’s real and it’s called ovaphilia), you’re not alone. You end up learning that there’s no room for judgement, and that’s a life lesson I wish a lot of people hadn’t skipped out on.
3. Sexuality is a journey.
It’s very much so like a woman’s anatomy. What you love one day, you might not be into the next. That’s perfectly normal. Your sexual needs and desires change over the years, as they should. What you said you would never have tried 10 years ago might be exactly what you want right now. There will be confusion, and rough patches, and awkward situations, and incredible orgasms, and falling in love, and I’m lucky enough to listen to the stories of real people who have used our tools to enhance their overall happiness. Which leads me to my final point.
4. I’m proud of what I do.
Aside from working with really cool people who are constantly giving me a new perspective on life, my work feels incredibly rewarding. When someone leaves a comment saying something we created helped them discover more about themselves or ignite intimacy with their lovers, it’s pretty damn cool. Intimacy makes people incredibly vulnerable. That’s where all the magic comes from, and everyone deserves to feel magical.