Did you know that LELO’s Wellbeing Experts write a monthly column in Wellness Magazine?
Well, considering that it’s a Sweden-only publication written entirely in Swedish, we don’t blame you if you’ve never heard of it.
Every month, reader questions are passed to our experts, who give their advice on sex-related issues that are on the minds of many.
Hi LELO!
My boyfriend comes pretty quickly when we’re having sex, and this leaves me having my orgasms in ways other than penetration. While not a complaint per-se, I’d like to be able to climax while we’re having sex.
Is there anything you can suggest to either help him last longer, or are there any tricks or moves to speed up the process for me?
Marie
Marie,
So it seems your boyfriend is finishing too quickly for you both to enjoy the main event, but what about the pre-game warm up?
Men and women are very different creatures, sexually speaking, and there’s a state of arousal called the ‘orgasmic plateau’, where, in both sexes, orgasm is imminent. It takes women considerably longer to reach this stage than men, so if you’re looking for more mutually-timed orgasms, we suggest a little forward thinking when it comes to foreplay.
You both need to spend some more time focusing on what comes before the actual act of sex itself, getting you ‘revved up’, so to speak, so that you’re as close as you can be to attaining an orgasm during penetrative sex.
Try incorporating a small external vibrator like LILY, ALIA or MIA 2 that can be used easily by you and your partner to get you to your plateau in a fast and fun way.
If your issue is that during lovemaking you get close, so close, right to the edge of climax – only to have him finish before you, try adding some extra ‘oomph’ to your intercourse.
There exist vibrators that you or he are able to wear during sex that will provide you with a bit extra rumble to get you over the edge of that plateau and tumbling into ‘orgasm valley’ (not a real term, but it works).
Try something like TOR 2 – a vibrating ring he can wear around his member that will not only supply external vibrations for you, but the gentle constriction of the ring can result in extra stamina for him – making it a sensual win/win situation!
If you’ve got a question for our Wellbeing Experts, feel free to send them to customercare@lelo.com.